Bolden Creek

I’m sitting outside of my favorite spot in Austin, Bolden Creek Cafè.  Journaling.  Appreciating nature.  Feeling the sun shining through the openings in the shade of the trees.  Listening to the chirping of birds and hearing the idle chatter of those sitting around me.  I have a peaceful feeling inside, for this is something that makes my heart smile.  Allowing myself to do and feel things as I wish.  My inner passions do not seem so silly nor do they feel so far away.  They feel possible, feel real, actually feel attainable.  I feel connected with my soul.  I am going to strive to constantly feel this way, to work on putting myself in situations where I naturally grow.  To consciously put forth this effort until I no longer have to work at encouraging this side of me to shine through.

I’ve thought of a few things during this sitting.  I’ve gone through changes lately; some great, some difficult.  I am starting to truly understand myself.  It has been a rather slow process, but I am opening up as I am ready.

I’m nervous, I’m anxious.  I’m bold, yet timid.  Where I lack confidence in some areas, I make up for it in others.

I’m beginning to allow myself to fully follow my path.  I was too scared and unsure before.  I’m allowing myself to come to peace with my past, with things that held me back from growing.  I’ve spent too much time dwelling on what I haven’t done or what I’ve missed out on.  Yet, as I dwell on the past, I continue to miss out on those same things in the present.  I am consciously focusing on exerting my energy towards things which make me happy ‘in the now.’

I’ve decided not to give you a challenge today, but rather an encouragement.  I encourage you to sit outside, under the shade of a tree.  Feel the wind blowing through your hair and over your skin.  Close your eyes and listen to the birds, to cars passing by or whatever is going on around you.  Just listen to the different things going on around you; those that you would normally take for granted.  And be. Simply be.  Appreciate all that you are and all that you are to become.   And all that I ask of you is to spread this new-found appreciation on to someone else!

Namaste.

Why not now?

As I posted in my last blog, I’ve recently move to Austin. I find that moving here has brought out a new Angelique. I am no longer in the comfort zone of my friends, my family and my job at Edie’s. I am having to learn to spread my wings among strangers. I have more time for myself than I’ve had in years. I am experiencing the town on my own and learning how to push myself to do things I’m not necessarily comfortable in. And through all of this I am pretty much the happiest I’ve been… EVER!

Austin is an amazing city, with so many unique aspects to it. Yet, I am realizing that Austin is not the only reason I am so happy. I am happy and content because I’m following my heart, listening to my inner voice. I am following my path, which is leading me to what I was born to do.

Yes, it is scary at times; but what’s life without a little spontaneity? For I can’t imagine not being here and am so grateful for it.

My challenge for you this evening is to take a few moments to think of what your inner desire is. What is your heart telling you to do? Are you living your life in accordance to this, or are you just pushing it aside? Thinking that someday I’ll run that marathon, someday I’ll start eating healthy, someday I’ll go visit my grandmother, someday I’ll move to a new state… Why not now? Why wait for tomorrow? Why go on living with the expectation that there is always tomorrow? Why not now?